big matt

i could only find the kubrick for blogger template with the blue header. where can you get a kubrick header for blogger? well, here.

i've made more interesting free kubrick for blogger headers. click the link at the bottom of the page for access to all of them.

you can make your own kubrick for blogger headers.

one of the lads at work was telling me how he thought the ban on smoking in pubs was wrong; he says its a persons right to smoke where they want. how can smoking be a human right? human rights protect education and free speech; not whereabouts you fag. what an idiot.

you don't go shouting in a library, claiming it's your right and that you'll shout wherever you want to, for the simple reason that libraries are quiet places, and your shouting would ruin it for all the old farts..erm,..i mean...people.

just like if you're not allowed to smoke in pubs, then don't smoke.

Labels: life

the chap on the bbc, reporting about the increase in sti's, made the suggestion that in order to prevent further increases, we stop having sex altogether. however, i believe there are more effective methods which wouldn't bring about the demise of the human race.

a preliminary test where you test yourself before any sexual encounter with a new partner. simply swab, post off for analysis and within three working days a report is returned with a thumbs up or a tits up for the go ahead. in the mean time, you chat, sober up and realise you didn't really want to shag each other anyway.


alternatively, badges.

Labels: news

to stop kids getting fat, the government are thinking of banning adverts before the watershed for unhealthy foods. the theory being next time the kids are at the supermarket, buying their groceries they won’t be familiar with whatever it is fat kids eat.

oh, hang on, except kids don’t go shopping…their parents do…and now they’re the audience for all of the advertising that’s been shifted to after nine o’clock. what a quality idea…

Labels: life

got a phone call this morning from my lecturer

yeah matt i've noticed you've missed a couple of the seminars...

oh..er...yeah, i...erm... haven't been very well...

oh right ok, well the assesment is due soon and i was just checking that you were planning on coming this afternoon

oh yes, yes i was planning on coming this afternoon

thoroughly embarassing, but i'm not too sure how he got hold of my home phone number. i concluded the university must place agents next door to every student house in the city and monitor when we stay in bed

gonna have to start using a decoy-matt-shaped-mamakin in the mornings to fool them...that'll teach the bastards

Labels: life

how many more blades do razors need?

it seems all that happens when a new razor comes out is there are more blades...when will the madness end?!?

'now with 3000 blades, for an even closer shave...'

Labels: advertising

ok, so two armed policeman mistakenly shoot dead an unarmed man. a terrible, terrible mistake. yet now they face being prosecuted for an error of judgement (in my opinion), which they made whilst doing their job. surely their employers realise mistakes can occassionally happen, and should stand behind them; bearing in mind these mistakes could end in fatality. instead they are abandoned and sued for it...how come?!

not that im trivialising their actions; i think the family deserve a very sincere apology and explanation…but it seems to me the distinction needs to be made between malicious, deliberate, unlawful killing and tragic accidents that occur in the line of duty.

Labels: news

i'll be away in Spain for a majority of next year, so i figured this was an easy way for family/friends and the like to keep up with what i'm doing.

enjoy..!

Labels: life